In this episode, we answer the question: what happens when you keep applying for jobs and going for opportunities, but you never get them? What happens when you get so close, but don’t land the gig? How can you stop feeling like you’re good, but not good enough?
Helping out with today’s episode of the WANTcast is Angela Leigh, a mentor, coach, and leader in the fitness and wellness industry. Angela Leigh is the ultimate teacher’s teacher and leader’s leader.
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May was Mental Health Awareness Month – but just because the month is over doesn’t mean we should stop talking about it. I can’t think of a better guest to remind us of this: someone who is a prime example of taking your pain and trauma and turning it into something that can help and empower others.
Kate Van Horn is a wellness blogger, yoga instructor and entrepreneur based in Philadelphia. Kate promotes health through mindful living, intuitive movement, food freedom and a body positive message. Kate is the co-founder of a wellness events business, The GOOD Festival, which hosts festivals, retreats and workshops nationally. Kate was recently names 1 of 25 Influential Women to Watch in Wellness by Yogiapproved.com and her story and writing have been featured in mindbodygreen, Yoga Digest and Thoughtfully Magazine.
After recovering from an eating disorder and experiencing childhood trauma, Kate chose to heal through community. She now shares her story with her audience in hopes of about building a community centered in authenticity and radical self love. (Kate is also a dog mom, lover of matcha lattes and anything “woo woo”, from crystals to astrology and tarot.)
This episode is AMAZING for anyone who wants to build a community of like-minded people sans the BS (whether in-person or online), interested in creating serial success instead of being a one-hit-wonder, loves wellness but is looking for a little more substance than what’s on-trend, is curious as to how wellness practices can ACTUALLY heal past wounds and trauma…and, speaking of trauma, anyone who has either experienced trauma in their past that might be holding them back, or knows someone who is still working through their own trauma and might not even recognize it.
So grateful to Kate for sharing so much of herself and being so willing to talk about some sensitive subjects. This is definitely one of my favorite episodes, not just of this season, but of all-time.
(Note: we do not go into graphic detail, but if you have experienced trauma or abuse, please be mindful that we DO talk about these subjects. We make sure we don’t speak in a triggering way, but everyone is different – you know yourself best.)
This episode of the WANTcast is so graciously sponsored byFabFitFun, the seasonal subscription box that includes full-sized beauty, fitness fashion and lifestyle products and TRULY DELIVERS. Use code WANT for $10 off your first box (so $39.99 for super-quality stuff…usually valued at $200, such a steal!) atfabfitfun.com
If you liked this show, make sure to sign up for The (Good) Word, weekly WANT tips, tools, and resources to shift around your negative self talk patterns. Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and leave a five-star review if you’re feeling it, so that iTunes knows to get it into people’s ears AND so that future guests can get excited when I approach them to be on the pod. All that stuff helps the algorythms and goes a long way, plus, I love knowing what you’re enjoying and why, so I can give you more of it!
Rachel Winard is the founder ofSoapwalla, a indie skincare brand based in Brooklyn that prides itself on being pure, effective and trustworthy. The all-female company is based in Gowanus in a converted canning factory – so cool. After discovering that she had systemic lupus (an autoimmune illness that led to skin irritations), Rachel started creating products that wouldn’t irritate her skin. Today Soapwalla is a globally sold and recognized brand, and truly one of the OGs when it comes to the world of natural beauty. Soapwalla is proudly an LGBTQ-run business, an active advocate of gay and women’s rights, and works on getting customers involved too.
In this episode we talk about Rachel’s crazy and unexpected career journey from the arts to where she is now, how to advocate for a more inclusive and just world in both business and life, our mutual love for kind of unexpected things (like dinosaurs) and so much more. She is such a calming force and at the same time, so bright and effervescent – a friend of mine likes to say that certain people are like the “bubbles in champagne” and that’s definitely the case with Rachel.
This Episode Is Sponsored By:4 Weeks To Wellness The 4 Weeks To Wellness program is a plan that ditches quick fixes and helps set you up for long-term wellness success physically, mentally, and emotionally. It’s all about finding – REALLY finding – what works for you, putting your wellness puzzle together, and finding a way to do right by your body without giving up your life. It’s for anyone looking to make healthy changes (but lacking the framework and structure to actually make them happen) is gonna love this. Added bonus, Phoebe has personal experience with autoimmune diseases, thyroid issues, SIBO, Hashimoto’s – so if you do, too, Phoebe might be the accessible coach and cheerleader you need. It all happens online and is completely up to you how fast or slow you go.
Enrollment is open from now till April 20th, so go tothewellnessproject.comto sign up – use the code WANT for 15% off, AND be sure to enter The WANTcast in the How Did You Hear About Us section.
If you liked this epiosde and everything WANT is throwing down, be sure to head on over to the site and SUBSCRIBE to The GOOD Word, WANT’s weekly email love letter where you’ll get all the posts and pods delivered directly to your email doorstep, plus first dibs on events, workshops, and the stuff I’m WANTing each week that I think you’ll love too. Also head on over to iTunes and subscribe, and leave some stars and a review to spread the WANTcast love, I apprecite it more than you know.
Last week, I was at a networking event thing for activist-minded women in their twenties and thirties. Lots of rad women, lots of big ideas. Because I was feeling chatty and confident, I told myself to stay a little while longer, if just to finish my glass of “OMG It’s Finally Spring!” celebratory rosé. Because I’m an extroverted introvert and do one-on-one conversations, I gravitated toward the gal standing by the wall who was finishing her glass, too. A kindred spirit.
I ask her a little bit about herself – who she is, what she loves, what she cares about, how she spends her time on a daily basis and why (because I go hard right out of the gate). She asks me what I “do.”
So I tell her about WANT.
(And you guys, I was on fire. I promise it wasn’t just the rosé. I’d just gotten back from a speaking engagement and booked two more, I was high off of reading your beautiful emails sharing your incredible stories, and I’d finally started to own some of my long-term goals and get them rolling. I felt in my freaking element and ready to share the love!)
And then she asks me “So is that your side hustle?” And I stumble.
“…Well, no, that’s where I put my energy and efforts on a daily basis. That’s where the majority of my focus is.”
She cuts me off. “Yeah, but is it MAKING YOU MONEY.”
That’s not a typo. It’s not supposed to be a question mark. It’s a period.
Like she was trying to school me on “what I do.”
After years of struggling with “what I call myself” and how I explain who I am and what I’m about to other people – and, honestly, after reaching a really good place with it all and finally feeling like I can answer people in a way that’s succint yet doesn’t sell me short – I found myself thrown off-guard by her haste and candor. Plus I just didn’t want to talk about other things, ya know?
Thankfully, my self-awareness prevented me from getting defensive or snapping back at her. After what seemed like twenty seconds of gathering myself (probably more like two, not twenty), I calmly replied, “Well, it’s not my primary source of income, but I am, yeah” (which is not untrue)
“Oh,” she trails off…
We wrapped up our conversation and I made a beeline for the door. I couldn’t stay in this networky environment much longer.
I know. I know she didn’t mean anything by it. I know she was just trying to compartmentalize and simplify the information she was gathering. But her words stuck with me for days. Especially because she was…well, she was like me. It’s easier to brush off comments that rub you the wrong way when they come from people outside your age range or career or interest field. But peers are different. She wasn’t someone who was unfamiliar with the kind of “work” I was talking about. She was just…assuming it was on the side.
I have big problems with the terms “Side Hustle” and “Day Job.” I think they’re stifling, I think they’re suffocating, and I think they’re stupid.
It’s like when actors or painters or writers (hi) get asked what their “real job” is, because their work as an artist isn’t work that’s usually associated with paying the bills. To the artist, whose art is as real as it gets, asking “So what’s your day job?” feels like a passive-aggressive slam.
I have so many problems with this – where do I start? Using the words “day job” and “side hustle” assumes that one is serious and one isn’t. One pays the bills and one brings in a few dollars a month at most. One is a career at most and paycheck at least, one is a passion at most and a hobby at least. One is the big juicy main steak dish, one is the sad asparagus spears.
I realize that it’s human nature to want to simplify and find structure…but I think it’s downright dangerous to label what you do as a side dish instead of a main course. Or downplay the main course as merely something that gives you nutritional value.
If you’re constantly referring to what you love as unworthy of the spotlight, then how can you ever expect it has a fair shot at success?
I never, ever, ever refer to any of my jobs as Day Jobs or Side Hustles. To me, they’re all just different projects that serve different purposes. Never once did I refer to my job at a vegan restaurant in L.A. as my Day Job – and yet it was what paid the bills most of the time alongside my acting gigs and spin classes and freelance work. I never once referred to my acting or teaching or writing as a Side Hustle – and yet they brought in a handful of change each month at best. My restaurant job was not how I defined my days. My art was never on the side.
The restaurant helped me build community. The art helped me use my voice.
Instead of compartmentalizing my life into Day Jobs and Side Hustles when I go to parties or meet new people, I always lead with what I’m most excited to talk about. Most of the time, it’s WANT. Sometimes it’s my classes. Sometimes it’s a small one-off project I’m doing that fascinates me to no end. Sometimes it’s just a riff off of “I’m a writer.” But very rarely do I answer “What Do You Do” the way people expect I will: with a passion justified by a more “sensible” job.
I’m lucky enough to have multiple jobs that pay my bills. WANT is one of them. But I’ve also been working in the fitness and wellness industry for over a decade, and I love that too. And go figure, it’s the primary thing that pays my bills right now. There are a LOT of people who talk about turning your “side hustle into your main hustle” – screw that! Why can’t your side hustle be your main hustle right out of the gate? Why can’t your day job and your night job live harmoniously? In high school we had multiple classes that carried equal weight. Why not the same with how we spend our days? Nay, our lives?
Here’s the thing: you are where your energy is. What you do and how you make money MIGHT be the same thing, but might be the answer to an entirely different question. The concepts of Day Jobs and Side Hustles speak nothing to what you’re actually putting your energy toward – because they focus on quantity of hours and dollars, not quality of passion and vision.
“‘Side Hustle?'” my mom chuckled when I repeated the networking story to her. “I’ve never heard that term before!”
Mind = blown. Every third Instagram post, every other blog – everyone talking about how to develop a side hustle or turn your side hustle into your main hustle or whatever. It had been exhausting for quite some time now. The fact that she had never even heard of this was absurd. How was that possible?
And then I thought about it. And I remembered how she’d never encouraged me to have a Plan B like so many of my artist friends’ parents. “What will she do if she doesn’t make it?” people would gasp. “Katie is a smart girl. And she loves many things,” my parents would say. “She’ll figure it out.”
That mentality was such a gift to me. They knew I didn’t need to plan for “real life” with a passion on the side. Real life lived everywhere.
No one who is in my life would ever think of WANT as my side hustle. They know how many hours I put in working, and they know how much energy I spend making it the very best it can be. Maybe it doesn’t look like a “regular job” to people on the outside…but that doesn’t mean they’re allowed to shove it in a corner of generalizations and assumptions. The same goes for the other ways I choose to fill my days, whether they make money or not. I streamline when I need to, but I thrive on strategic variety. Nothing I do looks normal to the naked eye, and I am alright with that. It’s normal to me.
What I propose is this:
Down with the Day Job.
Down with the Side Hustle.
Let’s ask people what they spend their energy on, and tell them where ours is as well.
Let’s view what we do as different aspects of who we are. All main courses in their own right.
Plan A all the way.
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Do you ever feel like everyone else is running circles around you while you’re walking through quicksand toward success?
If you’re like me, you’re probably nodding your head vigorously, right? I thought so. Whether it’s business success, achieving that ever-elusive “healthy lifestyle,” or making an impact in the world, the pressure to perform is real.
A lot of times I find myself all tied up in mixed messages: one day someone’s telling me to do what works for me, the next day they’re telling me a $500 supplement is the answer to all my problems. One day I’m encouraged to go slow and steady, the next I’m being sold a recipe for overnight success. My life naturally ebbs and flows – sometimes I’m in periods of fast growth and rapid success, but most of the time it’s about those small shifts or baby steps.
So when websites, blogs, celebrities, influencers, etc etc etc etc tell me one thing but show me another, it can begin to feel like there’s this pressure to keep up. Especially in the “health and wellness” space.
The one site I have always turned to for no-bs advice that actually works for me and respects who I am isGreatist. It’s a website and media company that truly talks the walk and walks the talk of living a healthy, happy life in a realistic, authentic, true-to-you way. Have a little too much to drink this weekend? That’s cool, we’ll help you feel better. No time for a workout today – like, really, no time? Don’t stress about it. Having trouble at work or making friends as an adult? We feel you. Greatist never judges, has always “been there too,” and never pretends like we need to overhaul our life to make it what we want it to be.
I’ve been die-hard obsessed with Greatist since they launched in 2011 – you’ll hear more about why in today’s episode. I know a lot of brands say they’re all about balance and staying true to yourself…but Greatist is one of the only ones that actually means what they say. It’s not about being the healthiest all the time, it’s about being healthy-ish. And as today’s WANTcast guest told me, it’s not about being the greatest all the time. It’s about working on greatness like an artist works on art. It’s about being a great-ist.
Derek Flanzraich is an entrepreneur on a mission to give everyone a healthyish attitude. He is the CEO & Founder of Greatist, a next-generation media startup working to make healthy living cool and build the first truly trusted healthy living brand for this generation. Derek’s been building brands and organizations that last since his dog-walking business at 10 years old, so he knows a thing or two about what it takes to create something with long-term value and meaning.
I love our conversation so much. In this episode, Derek and I talk about building a brand that lasts, taking hits and making compromises, and the gaping hole in the health and wellness industry that led Derek to found Greatist. We also talk about the state of masculinity, the future of gender neutrality, the three things anyone can do to live a “healthy-ish” life, and why health and wellness can’t just begin and end with food or exercise.
We had a blast together – he is truly a WANT Man through and through. So down to earth, so genuine, and so the embodiment of this brand he’s created. I mean, anyone that can play Drake-related games with me and not think I’m a crazy person is an A+ human being in my book. Don’t ask. Just take a listen.
Like this episode? Shoot me a comment below, leave a review on iTunes (the more reviews, the more Derek’s message is spread), share it on Facebook, tweet it out on Twitter, or post it on Instagram. Be sure to use the hashtags #WANTcast, #womenagainstnegativetalk, and/or #WANTyourself!
I know that a lot of people are saying things like “2016 sucked!” “Good riddance 2016!” “Go home, 2016, you’re drunk!” etc etc. And yes, there were some crappy moments. But it’s important for us to remember how much GOOD there was within the last twelve months as well (personally ending with some great news I reveal on the pod).
So here’s where I’m at: I’m choosing to look at 2017 as the year where we sort of, as one of my role models Glennon Doyle Melton says, sift through the crises of 2016, sift through the muck of last year, and then take what we have left over – the stuff that really counts – and just build on that into the stratosphere.
Today’s guest is the perfect person to help us move forward fearlessly into a new era. Today’s guest is Sarah Britton – author, holistic nutritionist, certified nutritional practitioner, and artist (you’ll hear why later in the podcast) who’s based in Copenhagen Denmark. She is the creative force behindMY NEW ROOTS, an award-winning food blog featuring original recipes that taste great, look beautiful, and boast incredible health benefits (ps, she’s been doing this since 2007 – so she really is the food blogger OG).
In this episode we talk about overcoming obstacles, manifesting things in your life and how important it is to be mindful of what you wish for, how Sarah completely revamped her relationship with food, and three things that ANYONE can do to remove what Sarah calls the fog from your life and wake up FULLY. I’m talking super simple things that don’t involve going to a fancy store, searching for some weird gadget on Amazon, or overhauling your life – these are small tweaks that anybody can make no matter what your lifestyle. Basically, this episode is all about how to realize and actualize how good you’re meant to feel on a day-to-day basis.
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Like this episode? Shoot me a comment below, leave a review oniTunes, share it on Facebook, tweet it out on Twitter, or post it on Instagram. The more you share, the more Sarah’s message can be heard. Be sure to use the hashtags #WANTcast, #womenagainstnegativetalk, and/or #WANTyourself!